Mine for the Taking

Sometimes you see someone and it strikes you straight away that they are fantastic. Its not that they are perfect but there is some greatness that runs so deep in them it is a force in its self that draws you to them. So it was with Qudus.


My first morning in Mali, Youchaou was translating at Danse l’Afrique Danse! (Dance Africa Dance!) a contemporary dance festival. Contemporary Dance was my major at university so I can't describe how blessed I was to be there. The first discussion we attended was questioning the place of Traditional African Dance in the world of Contemporary Dance and the impact Contemporary Dance has on the evolution of Traditional African Dance.


Qudos is not a huge man, his presence isn’t aggressive but he is captivating. He spoke with a deep insight and balanced feeling, was unimposing yet strong in presence and his huge charisma was balanced with the extensive humanity he was able to communicate. I decided before he finished speaking that I wanted to know him.


I have this theory that I hold on to with both hands when I want something but usually the fear of reaching for it seems greater at the time than the possible rewards of possessing it. I remind myself:
• This may be my one and only opportunity.
• Good things come when I capitalize on my opportunities,
• I don’t know the limits of how fantastic it could be or what greatness it could lead to.
• I remind myself that if people think I am a fool I wont let it bother me because all I am do is trying to cultivate greatness for myself (and often others too.)
• And that if I swing and miss I have given it my all, received my answer and won’t be left with should-haves or regrets.

This is the same theory that propelled me to kiss Heath Ledger when I was 17 while my friend Jess ran and hid. It’s still working for me.


After the first discussion Youchaou and I had to rush off and I missed the opportunity to connect with Qudus. 2 days later I found myself back at the festival and was stoked when I recognized him in the crowd. My heart was beating out of my chest, I couldn’t think straight. I was freaking out and had no idea that I should have been feeling this way at the thought of what I was about to do.


Clearly going out of your way to introduce yourself to someone new is a scary situation. But it was a black and white. Following my heart and body would mean pulling the pin while I had time and letting the opportunity slip by. Or I could go with my head telling me that nothing too bad can come of this and so I should push ahead. Why would I not?

I scribbled my name and email address on a scrap of paper I ripped from my note book, excused myself from Youchaou asking him to wait for me for a moment and walked up to the group that was crowed around Qudus. I had no idea what his first language was as I had seen him speak English and French and this panic thought chose that moment to flash across my forehead. I was so nervous that things were already a bit blurry and I interrupted because I was far too nervous to read the social cues. Not the smoothest start.


“Hi, I’m Dallas, I saw you speak the other day, umm, on Tuesday I think at that other discussion.” Confused looks all round for a few moments before the girl that was giving me the evil eye for standing between her and Qudus told him what I was talking about. “So I just really loved what you said and I would love to know more about what you do. ” At that point I handed him my email address on the scrap of paper.  He looked very confused so I added, “ I used to dance when I lived in Australia.” His eyes went from the scrap of paper to me to his friends and back to me but his intense look of confusion didn’t ease.


We shared pleasantries and I clutched at all the composure I had left and tried to look confident as I walked away and not like I was running.

Five minutes later I blindly followed Youchaou as he walked up to Qudus and introduced him to me as a world famous dancer! It was just the 3 of us so there was nowhere to hide and I was kicking myself hard. This guy probably thought I was crazy and I was pretty sure I didn’t have enough time to change that opinion.


I often wish that people could understand me in and instant but I have never mastered the art of letting people in, to see me, in the blink of an eye. The best answer I have is to choke any insecurities I have in that moment and be my best self. It was easier said than done this time but he warmed to me; it may just have been that I was no longer just a crazy white woman all the way from Australia at a festival for African dancers but I was legitimately connected through Youchaou.


I think I came a fair way from crazy in his head though because Qudus gave me his blog (http://www.qudus.blogspot.com/)  and email address; but I am still yet to hear from him. And while I still cringe when I think about that moment standing in front of him and the group starring me up and down it’s a better feeling than regretting that I could have learnt more about what he does but inhibited myself from knowing. As it turns out what I really wanted was to learn more about what he does and I can do that through his blog- perfect :)